The revised spellcasting rules in Lamentations of the Flame Princess had some miscast rules that made this an interesting exercise, but I never used it in anger.

Image by Роман Рябенко, CC0, via Wikimedia Commons.

Recovered: Some Spells

Drown

Magic User 1
Duration: 2 rounds/level
Rage: Touch
Special: Must have unwillingly taken drowning damage to learn this spell.
Trick a brain into drowning. Each round that the target fails a save (paralyzation), choose to either advance the spell a stage or return to 0th stage. The 0th degree takes effect immediately.

• Stage 0: Target cannot move, but can speak and breathe. Further saves at a disadvantage.
• Stage 1: Additionally, target cannot breathe and takes 1d6 subdual damage this round.
• Stage 2: Additionally, target takes 1d6 (normal) damage.
• Stage 3+: Additionally, target loses one point from a random ability score (permanent).

If subdual damage + real damage > HP, the target is unconscious and the spell ends. The target must be physiologically able to drown.

Miscasts

1. Also trick your own brain. The spell affects you the same as the target (use target’s saves for progression).
2. Trick everyone’s brain. The spell affects everyone around you in a 120’ radius (use target’s saves for progression).
3. PTSD. Must save or flee from water. Rerolls mean save is at progressive penalty.
4. Water elemental that loves drowning people is jealous, attacks you (1 HD/level).
5. Casting this spell is always risky. Reroll frees the caster from this result, as they become hardened to its effects.
6. Target is immune to the spell, and can now hold their breath twice as long as usual. Caster grows to irrationally hate them if they don’t already.

Gills

Magic User 1
Duration: 6 Turns/level
Range: Touch
As Water Breathing, except lose ability to breathe air. The reverse is Lungs.

Miscasts

1. Permanent deep one mutation (nictitating eyelids, webbed fingers, etc.)
2. Spell is permanent.
3. Greater mutation for duration of spell.
4. Gills are non-functional, and now you can’t breathe.
5. The fish love you, maybe a little too much. Actions and visibility underwater are hindered by schools of fish, if any are nearby.
6. You have been chosen for a quest¹ from Dagon (or other suitable entity). Details will come to you in your dreams.

Raft

Cleric 1
Providence sends a raft of sufficient buoyancy and size to support 1d4 person-days/level. It appears on the horizon drifting towards you, such that it can be reached by an unencumbered swimmer without issue (barring other circumstances). The form will vary but it will have no inherent means of propulsion. Some forms may include:

• volcanic raft
• iceberg
• dense seaweed mat
• carcass of a great beast
• empty barrels & crates lashed together
• low-lying fossil cloud
• strange metal disc
• empty shell of a dragon turtle
• ants

Read Wakes

Magic User 1
Duration: 1 Round/level
Range: Self
In a perfect Newtonian world, information is never lost, it merely gets quieter and quieter. This spell lets you read the history of the ocean before you. Once each round, you may learn one of the following things:

• What was the bearing of the most recent ship to pass here, and when was that?

• What direction is the nearest stationary object?

• Where and when did anything most recently break the surface of the water intermittently (like a whale surfacing or a stone skipping)?
  This spell does not work in the rain or when the water is otherwise busy. If a question is asked again, you can read further back in history (e.g. the second most recent ship to pass).

  Miscasts

1. Visions of the rain—severe headache incapacitates caster for 1d6 rounds/level. No information gained.
2. Echoes of creation—permanent deafness (this does not hinder the spell).
3. Ghosts of the flood—each day save or be possessed by an antediluvian ghost (with their own, worse CHA, WIS, & INT). They lose interest after a week of saves.
4. Harmony of nature—save or be compelled to join your ghostly whale friends swimming through the sea.
5. Bad point of reference—information given is actually about the future. This could raise issues about free will, but don’t let it bother you. At least it’s good information.
6. Transmission from the stars—1d4 permanent damage to a random ability score, and you learn a weird new spell.

Transmute

Magic User 1
Duration: Permanent
Range: Touch
When you learn this spell, roll for two materials, then roll for 1 more material/level. When you gain a level, roll again for an additional material. You can transmute the volume of 1 person/level from any one material you know to any other material you know. Allow saves as appropriate. Some materials include others, and this is not a mistake. For example, “stone” includes “marble”. You cannot choose to transmute to the more specific material if you do not know how.

Miscasts

1. Transmutation fails, and target is immutable to any future magic.

2. Transmutation fails, and you forget the target material.

3. Transmutation is successful, but only for 3d6 (1d4: 1-seconds, 2-minutes, 3-hours, 4-days).

4. Target goes to a random target material.

5. Target goes to a random target material, and you learn to transmute that material!

6. Transmutation is successful, but grafts itself to your body.

   Materials (4d20)

   If you re-roll a material, move up or down the list until you find a new one.

4d20	Material	Notes, Examples
4	illusion	like a hologram or something
5	lava
6	diamond
7	sponge
8	snakes
9	poison	retain form but become poisonous
10	nitrogen	~79% of air, asphyxiant
11	mercury
12	liquor
13	jade
14	ink
15	gunpowder
16	Bakelite
17	amber
18	aerogel
19	gold
20	wool	felted, loose, pelt
21	wax
22	tin
23	silver
24	sand
25	rubber
26	rags
27	needles
28	ice
29	chocolate
30	ceramic
31	brimstone	i.e. sulfur
32	arsenic
33	steel
34	mud
35	fungus	edible, myconids, mycelium, magic
36	flesh
37	charcoal
38	bread
39	wood
40	metal
41	keratin	hair, fingernails, fur, hooves, horns, feathers
42	dung
43	leather
44	stone
45	bone
46	chalk
47	clay	unfired
48	fruit
49	glass
50	oil
51	tubers
52	ashes	the solid remains of any fire
53	bronze
54	chitin	exoskeletons, scales
55	copper
56	lead
57	paper	papier-mâché, origami, stacked
58	ropes
59	salt
60	seeds
61	soap
62	water
63	wine
64	bottles	normal bottles, anything hollow and bottle-like
65	acid	standard “fantasy acid”
66	air
67	ants	for range purposes, maybe consider a hive as one organism
68	blood
69	honey
70	ivory
71	leaves
72	marble
73	nacre
74	oxygen	does not itself burn, but in pure oxygen most things do
75	rust
76	sodium	reacts with water
77	tea	pressed, loose, steeped
78	ectoplasm	makes a thing into a ghost, or vice versa
79	radium	does radiation make superheroes or corpses?
80	void	as sphere of annihilation

Materials (flat)

The table above is vaguely weighted with more common materials in the middle, so that hopefully you aren’t stuck with “Transmute lava/ectoplasm/jade” as your only options. But I’ve been wanting to try out Spwack’s thing, so you can also use this to roll flat across the whole table if you feel chaotic.

Transmute

Magic Mouth

I also tried to come up with mishaps for the existing Magic Mouth spell.

1. Continued recording for double duration.
2. No volume control. Playback causes sonic damage.
3. Backmasked. Voice sounds demonic and words are gibberish.
4. Fourth wall-breaking. Spell captures the caster’s player’s most recent voicemail.
5. There is no trigger, the spell just plays on loop and can’t be stopped.
6. The intent of the recording is inverted (e.g. “not” is added in front of the right words).
7. Actually records the caster confessing a secret.
8. Actually records a secret about the campaign world, or a heresy. 50% chance true.

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The spells Drown, Gills, Raft, Read Wakes, and Transmute were first shared November 11, 2018. The Magic Mouth mishaps were shared on July 16, 2019. The material generator was re-built using the most recent version of Spwack’s generator generator.

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1. This once linked to a quest generator, which is, alas, no more.↩︎

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